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-Antievolution.org Discussion Board
+--Forum: After the Bar Closes...
+---Topic: A Thread Short of a Fugly Sweater started by Kristine


Posted by: Kristine on July 12 2011,13:48

Remember Mad Magazine's "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions"? Well, here is where you can add your punchy, sig-worthy ID/UD/Dembscream one-liners!

"Joseph at UD would make even Casey Luskin's eyebrows travel so far up his forehead as to become a cowlick."

(With thanks to Nabokov's Lolita.)

Okay, people, make with the metaphors. :)
Posted by: OgreMkV on July 12 2011,14:02

Can't beat Joe "Termites ARE intelligent agents" G with his famous admission of cherry picking

"I have read many. I just need to find the one that supports my claim."
Posted by: Steverino on July 12 2011,14:47

Oh, I don't know...these two from TerryP at Scam



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
"I was a science teacher many years ago, back in the 80's. We talked mostly about science and not evolution."

"I'm not a big fan of gaining more intelligence, because it contains the truth."
---------------------QUOTE-------------------



I called him a Tard and the Mod sent me an email informing me that I had inflicted great pain by calling him a Tard...and would I please stop.  

Made my day. ;-)

This stuff just writes itself.
Posted by: olegt on July 12 2011,14:57



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
< 33 >
gpuccio
06/25/2010
1:13 am

Again “how much”. I don’t think that’s a good way to be quantitative.

---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Posted by: J-Dog on July 12 2011,15:01

I don't have a link to it, but for sure, Joe's famous - or infamous line - is sig worthy!:

"Ice Is Not Water" - Joe G
Posted by: Kristine on July 12 2011,15:29

Thank you for inviting me - I have some new material. First, a little folk song: If I had a WEASEL, I’d/Weasel out of questions/I’d weasel out of answers/All over UD!

Thank you! Thank you! I wrote that myself.

Here’s one from Memory Lane:
ID/UD/We all scream for Dembscream!

Ah, that one never gets tired. And now one for the ladies:
I’m afraid that the only way to tighten Denyse’s prose is to unleash her paeanential…but what if she becomes a bucoholic? </Englishnerd>

Ah, UD: always one frame short of a Sasquatch film. Eating with one chop stick, their pathetic level of detail wouldn't fill a Rauschenberg painting.

Thank you! I’m here until Thursday! :D
Posted by: Ptaylor on July 12 2011,18:05

I'm not sure if it's the intention of this thread, but here are some of my personal favorites from UD (mostly originally spotted by others here):
< Gil >:        

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
I am Richard Dawkins’ worst nightmare — a former militant atheist and Darwinist
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


< Joseph >:        

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
To this day I kick myself for not going to the “Kitzmiller” fiasco…
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


< Dense >        

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
I wouldn’t be bothered reading about the selfish gene because it has never been identified.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


<
DaveScot >(sniff):      

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
We have a keen nose for bogus science here, folks.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


< StephenB >:      

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
Born again 77 is one of the most scientifically knowledgeable posters on this site, and he continues to wipe up the floor with Darwinists who cannot even begin to answer or even approach must of his points.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


...coupled with...
< bornagain77 >:      

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
correction billionn trillion = 10^21 = 10^9 + 10^12
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


And of course my current sig!

Edited: my, not by (I have a cold).
Posted by: Kristine on July 12 2011,19:44

Well, I was kind of hoping for your words - you are wittier than the UD guys (unless they unintentionally really let loose with a malapropism). Something along the lines of:

Dembski, Dembski, Dem Dry-ski! Now hear the Word of de Bored! Or...

UD: True Blotter of Old Tyme thou art!
Who alterest all posts with thy sneering lies.
Why prayest thou thus over the archivist’s heart,
Culture, whose wars are Truth's demise? :)

Something like that. :D
Posted by: OgreMkV on July 12 2011,22:13

Alright you UD IDiots, listen up! You see this? This... is my evidence! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Origin of the Species. Amazon's top of the line. You can find this in the SCIENCE department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Down House, England. Retails for about a thirty five, ninety five. It's got a leather binding, red bookmark thingy, and chock full of evidence. That's right. Shop smart. Get evidence. You got that?
Posted by: Schroedinger's Dog on July 13 2011,00:25

Quote (OgreMkV @ July 13 2011,04:13)
Alright you UD IDiots, listen up! You see this? This... is my evidence! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Origin of the Species. Amazon's top of the line. You can find this in the SCIENCE department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Down House, England. Retails for about a thirty five, ninety five. It's got a leather binding, red bookmark thingy, and chock full of evidence. That's right. Shop smart. Get evidence. You got that?
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Army of Darkness reference FTW!!!
Posted by: fnxtr on July 13 2011,01:14

Quote (Schroedinger's Dog @ July 12 2011,22:25)
Quote (OgreMkV @ July 13 2011,04:13)
Alright you UD IDiots, listen up! You see this? This... is my evidence! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Origin of the Species. Amazon's top of the line. You can find this in the SCIENCE department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Down House, England. Retails for about a thirty five, ninety five. It's got a leather binding, red bookmark thingy, and chock full of evidence. That's right. Shop smart. Get evidence. You got that?
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Army of Darkness reference FTW!!!
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


"Who wants some?!?!?"
Posted by: Seversky on July 13 2011,04:07

I know what you're thinking, Dembsk. You're thinking "did he win six cases or only five?" Now to tell you the truth I forgot myself in all this excitement. But being this is evolution the most powerful theory in biology and will blow ID clean away, you've gotta ask yourself a question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, Dembsk?
Posted by: Steverino on July 13 2011,05:06



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
"Darwin... you magnificent bastard, I read your book! "
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Posted by: Schroedinger's Dog on July 13 2011,05:58

-UD happens-
Posted by: J-Dog on July 13 2011,07:59



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
Carl Sagan
---------------------QUOTE-------------------



UD - We're laughing at you, not with you!
Posted by: Robin on July 13 2011,08:02

There are a number of Louis' responses I'd love to post, what with all their wit and creativity. I believe my sig will suffice for an example.
Posted by: Kristine on July 13 2011,08:25

Quote (Seversky @ July 13 2011,04:07)
I know what you're thinking, Dembsk. You're thinking "did he win six cases or only five?" Now to tell you the truth I forgot myself in all this excitement. But being this is evolution the most powerful theory in biology and will blow ID clean away, you've gotta ask yourself a question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, Dembsk?
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


:D
Posted by: Schroedinger's Dog on July 13 2011,08:41

UD: "It's not a moon, it's a turd station" - Obiwan Kenobi
Posted by: k.e.. on July 13 2011,08:44

SHUTTUP AND LISTEN HOMOS!

READ MY SIG. dtard retired Blog Tzar
Posted by: Henry J on July 13 2011,11:15

There's the phrase once used by Murray Slaughter to describe a conversation he had with a coworker: "a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent".
Posted by: KCdgw on July 13 2011,11:55

Quote (Henry J @ July 13 2011,11:15)
There's the phrase once used by Murray Slaughter to describe a conversation he had with a coworker: "a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent".
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Bringing a rubber chicken to a cockfight.
Posted by: khan on July 13 2011,13:01

As said of Densy: "Don't bring a cabbage to a brain fight."
Posted by: Schroedinger's Dog on July 14 2011,06:04

Copied from UD thread 3:



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
Just a notice to anybody of the male persuasion who is  planning to propose to me, in an elevator, phone booth or anywhere else:          

---------------------QUOTE-------------------

I am fully armed at all times.

I carry a concealed O'Leary and I know how to use it!  

Don't fuck with me or I'll have her explain Weasel to you.

In Canadian.


---------------------QUOTE-------------------


---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Posted by: Tracy P. Hamilton on July 14 2011,07:07

A few postscripts short of a kairosfocus reply.
Posted by: OgreMkV on July 14 2011,07:46

Quote (Tracy P. Hamilton @ July 14 2011,07:07)
A few postscripts short of a kairosfocus reply.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


kairosfocus reminds me of L. Ron Hubbard's Mission Earth decology.

He said in ten books, what it would take a good writer to say in about 300 pages.

Or, if you prefer

Why say it in a few sentences, when, with proper padding, you can make a dissertation out of it?
Posted by: Freddie on July 14 2011,08:05

Too obvious?

"I WANT THE TRUTH™" ...

"YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH" ...
Posted by: Gunthernacus on July 14 2011,10:09

The Argument Regarding Design - Zachriel

"It never fails to amuse me that the probabilty of the sun coming up yesterday remains a question for IDers" - < K.E. >
Posted by: fnxtr on July 14 2011,23:56

ID is the sea lice on the salmon of science.
Posted by: Henry J on July 15 2011,09:39

Quote (fnxtr @ July 14 2011,22:56)
ID is the sea lice on the salmon of science.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Is that its way of trying to swim upstream?
Posted by: fnxtr on July 29 2011,18:27

ID is a millstone on the road to understanding life.
Posted by: Henry J on July 29 2011,23:18



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
ID is a millstone on the road to understanding life.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Or an albatross on the voyage to doing so.

Henry
Posted by: OgreMkV on July 29 2011,23:25

Intelligent Design, making otherwise intelligent people into IDiots for 210 years.
Posted by: fnxtr on July 30 2011,14:44

Quote (OgreMkV @ July 29 2011,21:25)
Intelligent Design, making otherwise intelligent people into IDiots for 210 years.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Terse, but needs to be rewritten every year.
Posted by: Cubist on July 30 2011,17:39

Better, because it reduces the need for rewrites:
Intelligent Design: Making otherwise intelligent people into IDiots for over 200 years.
Posted by: Kristine on July 30 2011,17:57

Someone here (Rich?) once said of one of the UDudes, "he's hoisted by his own petard (why do I want to put a hyphen there?)."

That was great. :)
Posted by: Henry J on July 30 2011,18:58

ID, a movement that tries to go beyond the Paley, but doesn't make it.

Henry
Posted by: Louis on July 30 2011,19:03

Quote (Henry J @ July 31 2011,00:58)
ID, a movement that tries to go beyond the Paley, but doesn't make it.

Henry
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Another pun cascade? I wish you good heath, sir! Watch how you go.

Louis
Posted by: Henry J on July 30 2011,19:13

In that case, let us forget that I said anything here...
Posted by: J-Dog on July 30 2011,21:17

Quote (Louis @ July 30 2011,19:03)
Quote (Henry J @ July 31 2011,00:58)
ID, a movement that tries to go beyond the Paley, but doesn't make it.

Henry
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Another pun cascade? I wish you good heath, sir! Watch how you go.

Louis
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Don't sweater the small stuff...
Posted by: Richardthughes on July 30 2011,21:59

Joseph, this morning:



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
If it can't happen in a lab with controlled conditions then it ain't happening in the real world when conditions flutuate.


---------------------QUOTE-------------------



congratulations on getting science wrong at every level!

It's nice for the probability theorists to show us that if 600 generation with n members can't do it, 600,000,000 generations with n,000,000,000 has no chance. And science all about never, for both fruit flies and black swans.
Posted by: Kristine on July 30 2011,22:39

Quote (Richardthughes @ July 30 2011,21:59)
Joseph, this morning:

 

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
If it can't happen in a lab with controlled conditions then it ain't happening in the real world when conditions flutuate.


---------------------QUOTE-------------------



congratulations on getting science wrong at every level!

It's nice for the probability theorists to show us that if 600 generation with n members can't do it, 600,000,000 generations with n,000,000,000 has no chance. And science all about never, for both fruit flies and black swans.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


I did not learn how to build a fire in the classroom, therefore Homo erectus could not have done it. :D

When IDists talk about "going back to the lab," they have from the last word left off the "b." :)

ETA - Corrected conjunction and PS - I think we need a "pun of the week" gif for J-Dog's hilarious sweater one.


Posted by: sparc on July 30 2011,23:18

Quote (OgreMkV @ July 29 2011,23:25)
Intelligent Design, making otherwise intelligent people into IDiots for 210 years.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


For most of the ID regulars I must strongly diagree with the "otherwise intelligent" part of that statement.
UD remains a sink that attracts male individuals stuck in adolescent  omnipotence phantasies from the very left side of the distribution curve.
Posted by: fnxtr on July 31 2011,00:10

Quote (Richardthughes @ July 30 2011,19:59)
Joseph, this morning:

 

---------------------QUOTE-------------------
If it can't happen in a lab with controlled conditions then it ain't happening in the real world when conditions flutuate.


---------------------QUOTE-------------------



congratulations on getting science wrong at every level!

It's nice for the probability theorists to show us that if 600 generation with n members can't do it, 600,000,000 generations with n,000,000,000 has no chance. And science all about never, for both fruit flies and black swans.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Can't build a pulsar in the lab; clearly astrophysics is wrong.
Posted by: Schroedinger's Dog on July 31 2011,05:32

In five year's time, ID will be the prominent theory of how we came to be - Bill Dembski, 2005

EDIT: Paraphrased
Posted by: J-Dog on July 31 2011,10:00



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
I think we need a "pun of the week" gif for J-Dog's hilarious sweater one.

---------------------QUOTE-------------------



Your welcome -but everyone here is gif-ed enough to win it every day! :)
Posted by: J-Dog on July 31 2011,10:03

Quote (sparc @ July 30 2011,23:18)
Quote (OgreMkV @ July 29 2011,23:25)
Intelligent Design, making otherwise intelligent people into IDiots for 210 years.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


For most of the ID regulars I must strongly diagree with the "otherwise intelligent" part of that statement.
UD remains a sink that attracts male individuals stuck in adolescent  omnipotence phantasies from the very left side of the distribution curve.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


sparc - My new sig line that I stole borrowed from rich sums this up perfectly!
Posted by: OgreMkV on July 31 2011,10:22

Quote (Schroedinger's Dog @ July 31 2011,05:32)
In five year's time, ID will be the prominent theory of how we came to be - Bill Dembski, 2005

EDIT: Paraphrased
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


No no.  It's THIS five years that ID will win.  I mean it this time.
-- Dumbski
Posted by: JLT on Aug. 07 2011,07:29



---------------------QUOTE-------------------
Uncommon Descent is 90% vacuous and the other half is apologetics.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


< Carlsonjok >
end


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