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+--Forum: After the Bar Closes...
+---Topic: Happy Birthday, Bob O'H started by Mister DNA


Posted by: Mister DNA on Feb. 18 2008,00:16

Happy Birthday to AtBC AND Uncommon Descent poster Bob O'H.

Are you gonna celebrate with us, or your friends at UD?

No matter where you're celebrating, I hope it's a good one.
Posted by: Bob O'H on Feb. 18 2008,00:44

Thank you (and thank you for the present, too!).

I'll only celebrate over at UD if Dave puts up a thread like this.  I'm sure the likes of Mapou and Joseph will be keen to pass on their fondest greetings.  I'll just make sure they have the first slice of any cake they give me.

Bob
Posted by: Mister DNA on Feb. 18 2008,00:52

Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,00:44)
Thank you (and thank you for the present, too!).

I'll only celebrate over at UD if Dave puts up a thread like this.  I'm sure the likes of Mapou and Joseph will be keen to pass on their fondest greetings.  I'll just make sure they have the first slice of any cake they give me.

Bob
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


You won't want any cake from UD - if it's not poisoned, it will probably be Cheesy Poof flavored.

It definitely won't be one of those delicious cakes from the Baylor cafeteria.
Posted by: Lou FCD on Feb. 18 2008,02:04

Many happy returns, Arab Hobo.

Drink much beer.
Posted by: Louis on Feb. 18 2008,03:01

Birthdays? Again? Will you people just stop getting older please? My body, the sad "follow the herd" loser that it is, cannot resist the peer pressue you're all putting it under and keeps aging, just so it can be with the cool bodies. Darn you all, darn you all to heck!

Oh I suppose I should wish Bob a Happy Birthday, frankly I don't know why I bother, as an atheist on a daily basis I obviously don't care about Bob or his birthday. In fact I'm just waiting in the wings with a sharpened copy of "On the Origin of Species" ready to bludgeon/stab you all to death for a shiny object you're carrying because I loves it and it is my precious.

So with that in mind: Happy Birthday Bob, have a beer and a smile on me!

Louis
Posted by: carlsonjok on Feb. 18 2008,05:15

As they say on the moon:

Hyvää Syntymäpäivää
Posted by: olegt on Feb. 18 2008,05:18

Happy birthday, Bob!
Posted by: Albatrossity2 on Feb. 18 2008,05:44

Have fun celebrating the day of your Nativity, Bob! And see if you can get Joseph to help you calculate the incredible odds against your being born on this very day.
Posted by: Reciprocating Bill on Feb. 18 2008,05:46

Sigh. It seems just like yesterday that I laid your squirmy wet body on your mother's belly.

{awkward silence}

Didn't she tell you?
Posted by: fusilier on Feb. 18 2008,07:05

Happy birthday!

{Only 38?  You're just a child.}
Posted by: PTET on Feb. 18 2008,07:59

Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,00:44)
I'll only celebrate over at UD if Dave puts up a thread like this.  I'm sure the likes of Mapou and Joseph will be keen to pass on their fondest greetings.  I'll just make sure they have the first slice of any cake they give me.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Happy birthday Bob. I hope DaveScot gives you a big kiss from me.

(Of course I'm just jealous that he talks to you).
Posted by: J-Dog on Feb. 18 2008,08:02

Happy Birthday to you,
You smell like a zoo.
You look like a monkey,
And The Designer planned it like that too, except we don't have hair like they do.  

But srsly - Congratulations, and thanks for sticking it out over there, so I don't have to.  

May You have been front-pants loaded for many more.
Posted by: Richardthughes on Feb. 18 2008,08:05

Alright.. we've got DaveTard ready to pop put of the cake....



Happy Birthday Bob!
Posted by: PennyBright on Feb. 18 2008,08:15

Grattis på födelsedagen!
Posted by: Kristine on Feb. 18 2008,08:52

Happy birthday, a day late.
Posted by: Erasmus, FCD on Feb. 18 2008,09:33

Damn that's old.  Congrats.
Posted by: Richardthughes on Feb. 18 2008,09:34

Quote (Erasmus, FCD @ Feb. 18 2008,09:33)
Damn that's old.  Congrats.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Bob > Natural Selection for another year! Huzzah!
Posted by: Hermagoras on Feb. 18 2008,11:11

38?  Is everybody here younger than me?  

Well, happy birthday anyway, Bob. Some day, you'll be old enough to join the banned.
Posted by: Bob O'H on Feb. 18 2008,12:47

Thank you, thank you kindly, one and all.  As well as tack, kiitos and merci.

It's rather disturbing to discover hold old some of you are (especially RB.  For the rest of you, I'm a minor medical miracle because of my 32 year gestation).

In case you're worrying, I'm celebrating in the only way possible



Skål!

Bob
P.S. You're not a day late, Kristine.
Posted by: Timothy McDougald on Feb. 18 2008,17:55

Happy Birthday! :D
Posted by: blipey on Feb. 18 2008,18:04

Happy birthday!  I'd drink a few for with you, but I've got an early show--and I'm close to BJU (they might try to save me).

I hope you don't spend too much time with us and do something with actual appeal.
Posted by: Reciprocating Bill on Feb. 18 2008,19:32

Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,13:47)
It's rather disturbing to discover hold old some of you are (especially RB).
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


You know, I find that disturbing too. I was 38 about a million years ago. But it only took 6 months to get from there to here.
Posted by: Louis on Feb. 19 2008,04:26

Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 19 2008,01:32)
Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,13:47)
It's rather disturbing to discover hold old some of you are (especially RB).
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


You know, I find that disturbing too. I was 38 about a million years ago. But it only took 6 months to get from there to here.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


One thing I find deeply pleasing about getting older is discovering how right my father is about so many issues. (Cue Mark Twain quote). I'm actually serious, it seems the wonderful old bastard actually knows what he's talking about most of the time. Frankly if you'd told me that when I was 13 I'd have looked at you with withering, youthful scorn and sneered in what I then thought was an impression of worldly cynicism.

Another pleasure of aging is discovering how wrong my father is about so many issues (cue Philip Larkin poem). I'm actually serious, it seems the wonderful old bastard is actually clueless about a remarkable number of things close to my heart (like science for example). Frankly if you'd told me that when I was 13 I'd have told you to fuck off for being rude about my lovely father whilst struggling not to agree wholeheartedly.

As Bill mentions, I've also noticed the time dilation/contraction effect of aging. Coupled with increasing admiration for my old man, and increasing scepticism about some topics, I've definitely noticed that these modern years are much shorter than they used to be. Why when I was twenty a year was 12 months long, now i'm thirty three a year seems to be about a week. Someone somewhere has to pay for this travesty! The thing that worries me is I suspect it's me.

And on that aged note, I shall wish Bob a Happy Hangover. May your liver regenerate rapidly and your kidneys excrete large quantities of acetaldehyde. Drink plenty of water, some liver salts (I recommend Andrews. The Alka Sletzer/Andrews combo in a pint of water is spectacularly effective. And if you're really suffering ditch the Alka Seltzer and substitute your favourite brand of ibuprofen/codeine combo. Remember, if seriously fucked paracetomol and caffeine can [cautiously] be added to the mix for that added zing. If really really seriously fucked stay with the liver salts and substitute a decent dose of Night Nurse. Take a few days off work afterwards. That stuff is lethal) and do nothing strenuous for a couple of days.

Of course there is the harsher alternative: GoGo juice. Take two raw eggs, half a bottle of Tabasco, 2 tablespoons of Worcestershire sauce, a pinch of celery salt, a large brandy, two large vodkas, some tomato juice (100 ml should do it, we want thick and nasty not thin and drinkable), two Extra Strong mints and a solid grinding of black pepper. Insert into blender, blend, drink, do six laps of the house screaming. You will now be cured. It's painful, but very very effective. Never ever EVER take GoGo juice (or my ex-rugby club's preferred variant Power GoGo juice, the recipe for which contains ingredients actually illegal in most civilised nations) lightly. It must only be used in the most serious of circumstances. You have my sympathy.

Louis
Posted by: Reciprocating Bill on Feb. 19 2008,06:38

Quote (Louis @ Feb. 19 2008,05:26)
...it seems the wonderful old bastard actually knows what he's talking about most of the time.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Not sure, but I think that I am the wonderful old bastard, with one kid at 21 and the other about to turn 18.

I hope I'm getting something right. And not too much wrong.
Posted by: pwe on Feb. 19 2008,06:43

Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,12:47)
P.S. You're not a day late, Kristine.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Kristine is always a day late -- and so am I  :)

Tillykke med fødselsdagen!


- pwe
Posted by: Louis on Feb. 19 2008,09:08

Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 19 2008,12:38)
Quote (Louis @ Feb. 19 2008,05:26)
...it seems the wonderful old bastard actually knows what he's talking about most of the time.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Not sure, but I think that I am the wonderful old bastard, with one kid at 21 and the other about to turn 18.

I hope I'm getting something right. And not too much wrong.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Based on my experience of you as a poster, not a father, I'd guess you were doing a great job and the ratio was about right. I shall of course ask some relevant leading questions. In this hypothetical scenario I am playing your 21 year old son:

1) Can I borrow the car?

2) My tuition is due, I have mysteriously come up short due to a "miscalculation" (and not a party of any kind), please can I "borrow" $3000 to cover the shortfall? What are the terms of any such "loan"?

3) This is Mwewe Katanga {click click derk} Hussein my fiancee. Will you refer to our (future) children as any of the following: a) the half breeds, b) mongrels, c) any culturally appropriate generic racial slur or d) none of the above, perish the very thought?

4) It would appear that a small portion of the house has been burgled/burnt/generally buggered/mysteriously urinated on after you have been away for the weekend. I, of course, have not had any parties and vehemently deny any accusation of wrong doing. Do you a) look me closely in the eye and point out that you did not fall of the top of a Christmas tree and that little will be said as long as the problem is rectified, b) liberally grass me up to mother, c) never speak to me again and boot me from the premises, d) other?

5) I come out as gay, your reaction is: a) marvellous, I need help with interior design, b) get thee hence from my sight foul and odious pervert, never darken my door again, c) initial silence then snide comments for eternity coupled with leaflets advertising "cures", d) I'm glad you said that son, there's something I've been meaning to tell you..., e) other.

6) I come out as a creationist, your reaction is: a) marvellous, I need help with....well nothing actyually you go for it my lad, b) get thee hence from my sight foul and odious pervert, never darken my door again, c) a series of informative, corrective science lessons, d) I'm glad you said that son, there's something I've been meaning to tell you..., e) other.

Thanks in advance.

Louis
Posted by: Richardthughes on Feb. 19 2008,10:40

Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 18 2008,19:32)
Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,13:47)
It's rather disturbing to discover hold old some of you are (especially RB).
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


You know, I find that disturbing too. I was 38 about a million years ago. But it only took 6 months to get from there to here.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


HAR HAR THIS IS YOU:


Posted by: Reciprocating Bill on Feb. 19 2008,11:02

Quote (Louis @ Feb. 19 2008,10:08)
 
Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 19 2008,12:38)
   
Quote (Louis @ Feb. 19 2008,05:26)
...it seems the wonderful old bastard actually knows what he's talking about most of the time.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Not sure, but I think that I am the wonderful old bastard, with one kid at 21 and the other about to turn 18.

I hope I'm getting something right. And not too much wrong.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Based on my experience of you as a poster, not a father, I'd guess you were doing a great job and the ratio was about right. I shall of course ask some relevant leading questions. In this hypothetical scenario I am playing your 21 year old son:
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


1) Can I borrow the car?

Sure, no problem. Don't bother gassing it up. I'll take care of the fender.

2) My tuition is due..

No problem. Same thing happened to me when I was a boy. Boys will be boys.

3) This is Mwewe Katanga {click click derk} Hussein my fiancee. Will you refer to our (future) children as any of the following: a) the half breeds, b) mongrels, c) any culturally appropriate generic racial slur or d) none of the above, perish the very thought?

Did I ever tell you about your mother?

4) It would appear that a small portion of the house has been burgled/burnt/generally buggered/mysteriously urinated on...

Look, shit happens. When I burned my parent's home to the ground we all laughed, roasted marshmallows and made s'mores. It was a special moment.

5) I come out as gay, your reaction is: a) marvellous, I need help with interior design, b) get thee hence from my sight foul and odious pervert, never darken my door again, c) initial silence then snide comments for eternity coupled with leaflets advertising "cures", d) I'm glad you said that son, there's something I've been meaning to tell you..., e) other.

That's OK kid. Your romantic and erotic destiny is your own. (What's it like?)

6) I come out as a creationist, your reaction is: a) marvellous, I need help with....well nothing actyually you go for it my lad, b) get thee hence from my sight foul and odious pervert, never darken my door again, c) a series of informative, corrective science lessons, d) I'm glad you said that son, there's something I've been meaning to tell you..., e) other.

WHAT THE FUCK??!! Get out. Pack your shit and get the FUCK out of here. YOU are DEAD to me. DEAD. How could you DO this to me? After all I've sacrificed. Oh God, Jesus, where did I go wrong? What have I done...{weeps}....
Posted by: J-Dog on Feb. 19 2008,11:16

Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 19 2008,11:02)
WHAT THE FUCK??!! Get out. Pack your shit and get the FUCK out of here. YOU are DEAD to me. DEAD. How could you DO this to me? After all I've sacrificed. Oh God, Jesus, where did I go wrong? What have I done...{weeps}....
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


RB - Words and actions to live by -

I just wish we could do that with ALL Creationists!
Posted by: Louis on Feb. 19 2008,16:34

Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 19 2008,17:02)
[SNIP]

WHAT THE FUCK??!! Get out. Pack your shit and get the FUCK out of here. YOU are DEAD to me. DEAD. How could you DO this to me? After all I've sacrificed. Oh God, Jesus, where did I go wrong? What have I done...{weeps}....
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


Excellent. I'd give that a A-.

The correct answer to question 1) should have included "Is the car ok son? You sure that Ferrari isn't more your style?" and the answer to 4) should have included a series of tips on future non-existant parties and which dealers to score the best gear from. Keys to the liquor cabinet/a delivery of booze would score bonus points.

Extra credit was also available on the final question for pulling a DaveTard-I'm-Scared-Of-Clowns-And-Actors style rant and threatening your now disowned loinal fruit with dogs/guns/chainsaws should his presence put your portal into penumbra once more.

Otherwise perfect. I shall be telegraphing these answers to your children forthwith. I apologise in advance for any and all repercussions.

Louis

P.S. Depending on severity of damage to domecile/car etc mild disapproval and ruffling of the hair can be appropriate. A severe arse kicking may only be applied in severe cases of damage to important items; porn stash, weed stash etc.
Posted by: Reciprocating Bill on Feb. 19 2008,16:44

Quote (Richardthughes @ Feb. 19 2008,11:40)
Quote (Reciprocating Bill @ Feb. 18 2008,19:32)
 
Quote (Bob O'H @ Feb. 18 2008,13:47)
It's rather disturbing to discover hold old some of you are (especially RB).
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


You know, I find that disturbing too. I was 38 about a million years ago. But it only took 6 months to get from there to here.
---------------------QUOTE-------------------


HAR HAR THIS IS YOU:


---------------------QUOTE-------------------


I knew I was being followed.
Posted by: khan on Feb. 19 2008,18:52

I'M GLAD I'M NOT YOUNG ANYMORE
From "Gigi" (1958)
(Lyrics : Alan Jay Lerner / Music : Frederick Loewe)


Poor boy! Poor boy!
Down-hearted and depressed and in a spin
Poor boy! Poor boy!
Oh, youth can really do a fellow in!

How lovely to sit here in the shade
With none of the woes of man and maid
I'm glad I'm not young anymore

The rivals that don't exist at all
The feeling you're only two feet tall
I'm glad that I'm not young anymore

No more confusion
No morning-after surprise
No self-delusion
That when you're telling those lies
She isn't wise

And even if love comes through the door
The chance that goes on forevermore
Forevermore is shorter than before
Oh, I'm so glad that I'm not young anymore

The tiny remark that tortures you
The fear that your friends won't like her too
I'm glad I'm not young anymore
The longing to end the stale affair
Until you find out she doesn't care
I'm glad that I'm not young anymore

No more frustration
No star-crossed lover am I
No aggravation
Just one reluctant reply
"Lady, goodbye!"

The Fountain of Youth is dull as paint
Methuselah is my patron saint
I've never been so comfortable before
Oh, I'm so glad that I'm not young anymore
end


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