RSS 2.0 Feed

» Welcome Guest Log In :: Register

    
  Topic: Anal Annals, A special for librarians< Next Oldest | Next Newest >  
Dr.GH



Posts: 2333
Joined: May 2002

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,17:53   

A female undergrad walks up to the desk for help.
"Hi, I'm looking for anal tourism research." She says.
I could not have heard her correctly.
"Um, what?" I reply.
"I'm looking for anal tourism research."
Like Thailand and Vegas? "I think there is a typo." I counter.
"No, my professor was very specific about anal."
I don't ask if there was an oral exam. "We can take a look, but I don't think that's right."
"Please? Anal research is important, I need it bad."
I start searching in the catalogue, typing in ‘annal’ to end this.
"It's anal, A-N-A-L. Anal was at the top of the list of the things he wanted."
I bet it was. "We don't have it under that listing."
"Well, how can I get Anal Tourism Research?"
Some Barry White, some K-Y, some minor discomfort.
"How about we try some variant spellings?"
"But I want anal."
"Please trust me on this." I don't want my boss to walk over while she shouts "I want anal!" again.
"Here we go, Annals of Tourism Research."
"But, anal..."
"Is something very different."
I could see the dawning in her eyes as she made the connection.
"I, anal, oh my god."
"Is there anything else I can help you with?"

Even when coeds are begging for me to give them anal, I'm still a professional.

From The Society for Librarians* Who Say Motherfucker

--------------
"Science is the horse that pulls the cart of philosophy."

L. Susskind, 2004 "SMOLIN VS. SUSSKIND: THE ANTHROPIC PRINCIPLE"

   
Doc Bill



Posts: 1039
Joined: April 2007

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,18:09   

As an analytical chemist I used to hate it when it was abbreviated.

(we were so poor we couldn't afford K-Y.  all we had was Johnson&Johnson "no tear" which was a damned lie.)

  
khan



Posts: 1554
Joined: May 2007

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,18:11   

I recall the days when I was a "Management Analyst" Mgt Anal

--------------
"It's as if all those words, in their hurry to escape from the loony, have fallen over each other, forming scrambled heaps of meaninglessness." -damitall

That's so fucking stupid it merits a wing in the museum of stupid. -midwifetoad

Frequency is just the plural of wavelength...
-JoeG

  
Occam's Aftershave



Posts: 5287
Joined: Feb. 2006

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,18:53   

As an engineer I see spectrum analyzer abbreviated "spec anal" in test procedures all the time.

--------------
"CO2 can't re-emit any trapped heat unless all the molecules point the right way"
"All the evidence supports Creation baraminology"
"If it required a mind, planning and design, it isn't materialistic."
"Jews and Christians are Muslims."

- Joke "Sharon" Gallien, world's dumbest YEC.

  
Dr.GH



Posts: 2333
Joined: May 2002

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,19:19   

Quote (Occam's Aftershave @ June 08 2009,16:53)
As an engineer I see spectrum analyzer abbreviated "spec anal" in test procedures all the time.

Is that "anal speculum engineer"?

--------------
"Science is the horse that pulls the cart of philosophy."

L. Susskind, 2004 "SMOLIN VS. SUSSKIND: THE ANTHROPIC PRINCIPLE"

   
sledgehammer



Posts: 533
Joined: Sep. 2008

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,19:41   

Quote (Dr.GH @ June 08 2009,17:19)
Quote (Occam's Aftershave @ June 08 2009,16:53)
As an engineer I see spectrum analyzer abbreviated "spec anal" in test procedures all the time.

Is that "anal speculum engineer"?

I've always referred to it as a "rectum analyzer", and the task of spectral analysis abbreviated "rectal anal" is an oxymoron.

--------------
The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny is alleviated by their lack of consistency. -A. Einstein  (H/T, JAD)
If evolution is true, you could not know that it's true because your brain is nothing but chemicals. ?Think about that. -K. Hovind

  
carlsonjok



Posts: 3326
Joined: May 2006

(Permalink) Posted: June 08 2009,19:57   

On a semi-related note, this reminded me of an email I saw way back in the day when email was a rare thing at my employer. It was mostly a tool on Unix boxes used by engineers. 1994 to be exact.

At the time, I was in materials management at an electronics assembly manufacturer and we were building a product for a customer in Japan. We were ramping up and had alot of conversations with the Japanese deployment team over material availability and production schedules.  One of our shortages was what was called a buttflange connector.  In one of the email exchanges, one of the Japanese engineers said the following:

Quote
I remember that we did get the butt connectors in sex weeks last August with EXTREME PAIN and extra cost.


Perhaps it is rather juvenile of me, but I saved that email all these years and it always makes me laugh.

--------------
It's natural to be curious about our world, but the scientific method is just one theory about how to best understand it.  We live in a democracy, which means we should treat every theory equally. - Steven Colbert, I Am America (and So Can You!)

  
  6 replies since June 08 2009,17:53 < Next Oldest | Next Newest >  

    


Track this topic Email this topic Print this topic

[ Read the Board Rules ] | [Useful Links] | [Evolving Designs]