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  Topic: Gordon's Diary, Thoughts from Montserrat< Next Oldest | Next Newest >  
The whole truth

Posts: 1554
Joined: Jan. 2012

(Permalink) Posted: May 11 2013,23:32   

Dear diary, I have some revealing admissions to make, For Diary Record, although in doing so I will be testifying against self-interest. Luckily, no one but I will ever see this diary entry:

I am a willful liar, a profound failure, a paranoid coward, a two-faced slanderer, a despicable sinner, and a power seeking charlatan. I am ridden with a mixture of amorality, immorality, and a dash of guilt and I selfishly take it all out on others to try to make myself feel like a feared, perfect, guiltless, all-powerful God. When I let my guard down and any guilty feelings rise to the surface I realise that it is actually myself that I despise, but then I quickly bury that guilt and that realisation under a massive mountain of deluded selfishness.

All of my dishonest, accusatory, sanctimonious, hypocritical tirades are a deliberate attempt on my part to justify my own evil thoughts and acts and to ignore my personal responsibility and self-hatred.

It is much easier and far more self-righteously satisfying to attack and demonize others than to accept and admit responsibility for my own wicked thoughts and behavior, and to correct my failures and wickedness would be too much work and would require sanity and a conscience that is much, much stronger than mine, so I will continue to be as tyrannical a person as I have been.

Yes, it is sad and I'm told that I should do better, but why? After all, arrogantly attacking others because of my own failures and wickedness is the only way that I can feel superior and at least temporarily obscure my self-hatred. Pretending to be God or a special messenger from God has its benefits, even though any benefits are merely self-serving delusions.

Now, I must get back to demonizing evolutionary materialists, atheists, and others who dare to disagree with me. Bydand!



P.S. Get on your knees and worship me, evomats!

Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. - Jesus in Matthew 10:34

But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me. -Jesus in Luke 19:27

  47 replies since Sep. 12 2012,00:11 < Next Oldest | Next Newest >  

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