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  Topic: [D] I Fool Musical, in which our favourite characters SING!< Next Oldest | Next Newest >  

Posts: 1334
Joined: Jan. 2007

(Permalink) Posted: Sep. 03 2009,08:45   

I read that a British dance company are staging a work inspired by Darwinís junket to the Galapagos †Ė video clip †here.

I have no doubt that all here share my indignation at the unfairness of this. Discussion of evolution should be balanced, preferably with grainy clips of goose-stepping Sturmabteilungen, indignantly-read scripture, and lascivious close-ups of Sarah Palinís big, firm, round, graspable, motherly spectacles. But this we cannot do, given the meagre resources left after meeting our commitments to godless depravity and corruption of the vulnerable.

In lieu of this, and as a token of the esteem in which we all hold the folks at UD, I propose we write an operetta for them. †I give below my unworthy preliminary sketches and invite fellow misfits, nitwits and nincompoops here to add to it as they may.

I need hardly emphasise the importance of this. Without attention, ID would surely wither away and die. And then where would we be?

Yeomen of the God Ė A One-Note Operetta

Overture, conducted by a handsome young man in a frilly shirt

Necessarily similar to, but by no means plagiarised from, La Gaza Ladra ("The Quotemining Magpie") by Rossini)


Chorus of HebrewJudeo-Christian Slaves

† † Our great countryís becoming a pain in the ass
† † Since they ripped out the Bible from Biology class
† † Our existence is teetering on the ledge
† † What we need is a strategy document called the Wedge.
† † Then those libruls will get what was always their due
† † And the White House will always be Red and never Blue.
† † And if high-tech all moves to some foreign land
† † It wonít matter Ďcause soon the Rapture will be at hand
† † Letís pray, letís pray
† † That the Rapture comes soon!
† † Letís pray, letís pray
† † That the Rapture comes soon!

[Enter Guillermo, a genius]
† † I found a watch, itís not my own, but Iíll appropriate it,
† † If someone says itís Paleyís, heíll be excommunicated!
† † Itís firmly sealed and how it works is purely hypothetical,
† † But unimportant stuff like that is really just pathetical.
† † This artefact no junkyard storm could possibly assemble
† † And if you say Lifeís not a watch, Iíll volubly dissemble.
† † So by default, we must assume, Design must be Divine.
† † This theory, which is all my own, is mine, I tell you, MINE!

[Enter Scrotus, Guillermoís lackey]
† † A hammer I hold oíer the heads of the herd
† † Of sheep who attend to my Masterís each word.
† † They soon figure out that an off-message bleat
† † Will have them ejected right into the street,
† † With a lump on their skull, right on top of their dome-o
† † So they better remember that I am il uomo.

Scrotus: Master, do you love me?
Guillermo: Hush, fool! Do you espy that curiously shaven canine walking in a most peculiar way?
Scrotus: ĎTis not a pooch, my lord, it is a Canooch.

[Enter Ritardella, a respectable, ummm, whatever...]
† † They call me a journalist, some kind of journalist, though I can never tell why:
† † My facts are selective, my grammarís defective, my IQ would make Daveís look high.
† † I blog for homeschoolers and other such droolers, though nobody visits at all.
† † I use first-class sources for all my discourses, like Fox and WorldNet and TownHall!
† † Iíve written a book, with a similar kook, on the spiritual nature of mind Ė
† † If you open my head, itís reliably said, that thereís nothing at all you can find!

Scrotus: Master, tell me, †do you love me?
Guillermo: (Ignores Scrotusís pleading) Ritardella, come to me.
Ritardella: Lose the fat kid first.

To Be Continued

Edited by Lou FCD on Sep. 03 2009,21:18

"People are always looking for natural selection to generate random mutations" - Densye  4-4-2011
JoeG BTW dumbass- some variations help ensure reproductive fitness so they cannot be random wrt it.

  20 replies since Sep. 03 2009,08:45 < Next Oldest | Next Newest >  


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